How do u say “Get a life” in friend-ish?

What drives a friend who seems keen on knowing where you spend your leisure time, do you know? I have a friend exhibiting this keenness and it’s bothering me, somewhat.

This friend is much older than the sister, but sexier, with a glamerous past and an exotic present that should have made the undersigned pee-green with envy instead of make the friend try to play Pink-Panther on her.

But such is the case. In an attempt to know who I spent the previous evening with and why I came to the office late, she suggests places, possible friends, etcetra.

Her need to know my whereabouts is only equalled by her need to know if I were having any “worries”. Let’s say I started a conversation with “Last night..” and she finishes my statements for me, with “I know! You didn’t get any sleep!”.

“Yesterday evening..” and it’s “I know! You felt lonely!”.

“Life…”, ofcourse, is followed by the clicking of the tongue, an “I know what you are going through” and the comforting back rub. If i told her something actually worthy, like God-forbid a family member getting sick, she comes around wearing the longest face in history that clearly says “…you poor thing” plus a sigh. So i gotta tell her to take it easy, hold her hands, instead of the other way around.

If it weren’t for what happened a few months ago, I wouldn’t have taken the time to notice how far my friend would go to prove me down, out and dangerous (awesome movie, wasn’t that?!). I was complaining of excessive body heat that day when she admits she and another friend were suffering from it too, and asked, spyingly, “are we worrying over what’s to become of us too much, do you think?”.

Instead of the correct diagnosis and actual response: “You wish!” I simply asked how can all the three of us have the same worries, when we have nothing in common, and suggested that weather-change may have something to do with it. She let that one go. But the probes seem to continue, inspite of the sister repeatedly showing disinterest to confide.

Don’t get me wrong now. There is nothing more I’d enjoy than giving a friend something to worry about if it’s what the friend needs to get her through the day. That is the kind of friend i am 🙂 . Unfortunately, I don’t have it. Haven’t been married for two years when I went back to living the single gals’ life, true, but it has its ups as well as the occasional down. Sundays maybe lonlier than usual, you gotta do without being kissed when you feel like it, etcetera, but it can be a God send too, for one who enjoys her freedom more than anybody. I wear what I want, stay out as long as I want, cook what I want and eat it too without a care in the world. Which maybe why I’m gaining weight by the hour these days :). I especially enjoy the fact that there is nobody I have to answer to as to my whereabouts which, I’ve always seen, as “my own damn business”. So I’m confused as to what to do with this friend who probes.

Suggestions, anyone?